all i am is me

2010-08-26T06:29:00.000-07:00

The mentality that some Singaporeans have with the reserved seats in trains is annoying. Ok, so there're reserved seats for the elderly/handicapped/pregnant, but does that mean that only the people who are sitting in those seats are expected to give up their seats? What about the people sitting in the seats without the sign above them, it's ok for them to stick their butts firmly to their seats while an elderly/pregnant/handicapped person enters the train looking for a seat? The idea is, "Oh, I'm not sitting in the reserved seat, so I don't have to give up my seat." It's about the willingness to give up your seat, regardless of which seat you're sitting on, not staring and waiting for the person sitting at the reserved seat to give up their seat.

And seriously, all you old aunties who literally push and prod your nasty little fingers into people's backs to rush and get a seat in the train, if you have so much energy to do that, then just jolly well stand. Grrrrrr.

2010-08-20T08:55:00.000-07:00

I'm still sitting in my own little well, aren't I?

2010-08-03T10:09:00.000-07:00

"Lost love is still love. It takes a different form, that's all. You can't see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a dance floor. But when those senses weaken another heightens. Memory. Memory becomes your partner. You nurture it. You hold it. You dance with it."

- The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom

2010-07-24T06:38:00.001-07:00

We're NOT objects of entertainment. Seriously, why is it that when they grow 3 strands of hair and start getting high, they think they're all that?

Takes more than that to call yourself a man you know.

2010-07-10T03:45:00.000-07:00

New beginnings come from within, not quite from the virtual spaces that we create.

2010-07-08T04:30:00.000-07:00

"Did you know there are thirty-two names for love in one of the Eskimo languages?" August said. "And we just have this one. We are so limited, you have to use the same word for loving Rosaleen as you do for loving a Coke with peanuts. Isn't that a shame we don't have more ways to say it?"

- Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd

2010-06-27T04:04:00.000-07:00

It's good to have thinking sessions once in awhile, cause they put things into perspective, right where they belong.

Have you had yours recently? =)

2010-06-26T08:17:00.000-07:00

Insecurities come from not knowing the facts,
from not knowing the truth,
from uncertainty.
No?

2010-06-16T06:59:00.000-07:00

If God doesn't give us a second chance,
we ought to seize it ourselves.

2010-06-13T06:18:00.000-07:00

"She had a bottomless well of love for me. Her only flaw was that she didn't make me work for it. You see, here's my theory: kids chase the love that eludes them..."

- From "For One More Day" by Mitch Albom

Are kids the only ones who do that?

2010-06-04T05:27:00.000-07:00

"People hurt the ones whom they love the most."

No, people don't, and shouldn't hurt the ones whom they love the most.

If you love them so much, then why would you hurt them? Aren't you supposed to think before doing anything that might affect them?

It's just another excuse for their irrational behaviour.

A very unfair excuse.

2010-06-03T07:10:00.000-07:00

People might forget what you said.

People might forget what you did.

But people will never forget how you made them feel.

2010-05-25T08:53:00.000-07:00

"And here's something else I will tell you, my dear young lady: Young men like to go on sprees; they like gayety and distraction, and all sorts of dissipations, and their wives may sit at home and wait for them till midnight. And they come home drunk, and bully their wives, and swagger. But an old man will just sit near his wife; he'll die before he'll leave her. And he would like to look into her eyes all the time and to caress her and to kiss her hands. [Kisses them.] Just like that."

- KORSHUNOV from the play "POVERTY IS NO CRIME"

2010-05-19T05:53:00.000-07:00

"I love the way you love, with all your heart and all your soul."
- Maxwell Sheffield from The Nanny

2010-05-12T06:20:00.001-07:00

You tell me you still want me, you tell me not to give up on you, but this shit happens all the time. The more I see you enjoying yourself with that kind of company, the more I hate who you've become. I'm not the kind of company you're looking for; my idea of fun is worlds apart from yours. If that's who you want to be, then please. I won't hold you back any longer, Spare me more of the hurt and dissapointment you've already given me, I simply can't accept the new you. It's enough. You need someone more accepting, and it's not me.

2010-05-08T05:04:00.000-07:00

It's funny how people judge and label people who do certain things, and then become one of them.

Honestly think there's nothing else left to say. There's no need for anymore explanations, apologies, feelings, or anything. Heard what you've had to say. Don't want to listen to anything else. We both know where we stand now. My cries meant nothing; you still remained cold, your voice sounded so stiff. If you didn't want it, you shouldn't have asked. But you simply said that it's a big mistake that you made. Don't even know if big mistake referred to me. It's not that simple. You don't toy with peoples' emotions like that. Only now do I realise all the lies and empty promises made, and I can't trust you anymore. You hoped that I would help, and when I sincerely want to, you ask me to leave you alone. You call me names. If you think you can handle it on your own, go ahead. But I can't just stand there and look at you change into someone I never dreamed you would. If after all these years of being good to you, you could still treat me like that, then there's nothing else left for me to say. I just realised what I mean to you, and I'm not going to be listening to anything else that you might have to say, cause you weren't there to listen, or to comfort, or simply just to be there when I needed someone. I've been far too nice and soft. Even when I was mad at you, I never ever hung up on you, I talked to you till we worked things out. Even when I was mad at you, I wanted to hear your voice. You yell and scream at me more when I cry, but if I ever had heard you in such a state, I would never have left you to cry alone, or hung up on you. But you did, all the time. You sounded so aggressive all the time. I'm done with this; I think we both are. I've never been this upset, it's not like me at all, I hate it, and I want to get this out of my system. I don't deserve all this shit, and you certainly deserve someone who is more accepting. Let's just get it over and done with when you're back. Let's keep it short. I'll finally leave you to be, like you asked me to.

2010-05-06T06:11:00.000-07:00

When your loved ones see you miserable and crying your eyes out, and still remain cold and emotionless, you know you don't mean much to them anymore.

WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS I THINKING????

2010-05-04T05:03:00.000-07:00

It's fine if you want to indulge in activities that are harmful to you.

It's NOT fine if you introduce them to your friends, and encourage them to take it up as well.

Ahhhhh who am I kidding. It's not like you're deprived of a brain, are you?

2010-05-03T07:23:00.000-07:00

I've never done this on my blog, ever, but I've reached a point where I don't care anymore. And that's saying something. I try and try to put everything that's happened behind and move on to a better start, but I don't think I can, or should, anymore. It's unhealthy. Emotionally very exhausted with this shit happening over and over again. It's not like me to take all this shit and then go back for some more. I don't know why I'm doing this. It isn't like me at all. I don't care how angry you are, you don't just throw out words like that. You don't know what it feels like, cause it hasn't been done to you, cause I've freakin always been there to comfort and talk to you whenever you needed it, ever since day one, and that's a freakin long time honey. You bloody think if anyone's ever done that for you; you don't even have to search long for the answer. People take it for granted don't they? Maybe this time, you really meant what you said. And I'm gonna give you what you asked for.

2010-04-23T06:37:00.000-07:00

"Relationships are like thighs. They start out smooth, then they get a little lumpy, but without them, you don't have a leg to stand on."
- Sylvia Fine from The Nanny

2010-03-12T05:09:00.001-08:00

Compromising and understanding is supposed to be a two way thing.

One party can't always be happy and accepting everything, and the other can't be expecting one to be happy and accepting everything.

It's just totally unfair.

You have to understand as well.

2010-03-11T07:02:00.000-08:00

Why do we not see the things that are right in front of us, and only feel the pain when it's gone?

Why do we not hold on to it while it's still there?

Why are we so afraid to give things a try, but let our doubts and fears hold us back?

Why do we sit and wonder about what could've happened, instead of knowing what did happen?

Why not just give it a shot?

2010-03-09T02:14:00.000-08:00

"Memories were fine but you couldn't touch them, smell them or hold them. They were never exactly as the moment was, and they faded with time."
-P.S. I Love You by Cecelia Ahern

Exactly why I find it so damn hard to let go of moments that will eventually pass by, no matter how much you try and hold on.

Memories aren't quite the same as moments.

2010-02-27T01:19:00.001-08:00

I had been wanting to post these things up for quite some time, and now I shall. These thoughts were actually spurred by one of the topics suggested for a module in school, which went something like "Spare the rod, spoil the child". My stand to that is neutral; yes, if your child is really out of hand and doing crazy things, then maybe, giving them a slap or two might work. But if you hit them for stupid reasons, then you should be hit too. These are some points I picked out from the net:

These might seem trivial to the children who don't, or never get hit, but it might make much more sense to the ones who did, or do get hit. And to the parents, yes, it's going to be in your child's head for a long, long time, if you hit them for issues that could have been talked about. Talking to them about issues and having a healthy discussion does help. And it wouldn't hurt to hear out your child's point. They aren't arguing with you all the time, sometimes they just want you to listen.

And for the guys out there who do this. Come on. We know you how much you love yelling out vulgarities when you're with your fellow guy friends. Sometimes we girls don't get it, when you use, "Fuck you" or "Chi Bai" or "Na Bei" or other such unpleasant words, strung together in a sentence, like they are conjunctions, in a perfectly normal situation, where everyone's talking normally. It's really unpleasant to hear it every few minutes or so, when you have such conversations with your guy friends. But that's ok. Just don't use it on us girls. We're not your chums, we don't think it's fun when you talk to us using such language, and it's DEFINITELY NOT ACCEPTABLE WHEN YOU USE SUCH WORDS ON US. You're degrading us, yourself, and you're coming across as an asshole. A decent guy would NEVER use such unpleasant words on girls like it's no big deal, cause it is. You especially should never use it on a regular basis, or whenever you get into a fight. It's disgusting. To give you a better picture, imagine some person yelling such demeaning words at your mother or your sister, and I think the idea will be alot more clearer.

And seriously, after having said all that, you give us your lame comforting words? Please. You can't try and take back words you already threw out. Alot of us will never understand that.

2010-02-20T21:16:00.000-08:00

For some, it always depends on convenience and mood doesn't it?

2010-02-18T07:58:00.000-08:00

Ok so I look at my blog and say, "What's up with all the sad posts?!?!"

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.........................

Here's a fun fact! =D

Did you know that the elephant is the only mammal that can't jump?

Hahaha! It's true! =D

2010-02-18T07:41:00.000-08:00

Yeaaaa....Sometimes blood ain't thicker than water....

Sometimes blood chooses people it's known for less
than a month and whom it has started calling
life partner, over you....

Yea sometimes blood ain't that wise either.

And it goes talking about the little one.

2010-02-13T05:56:00.001-08:00

Sucks doesn't it, when you can't talk about your feelings to people whom you thought would listen, but don't want to anymore?

I mean, do they actually know how upsetting that is?

Naaaaaaaah. That's cause they probably don't know what it's like, 'cause you're the big fat jackass who's always been there for them.

Will get used to it. Am already getting used to it.

Sweetness!!! =D

2010-02-10T08:12:00.000-08:00

Yea uh-huh, if men use the excuse of needing special "proteins" found in protein shakes to build-up muscles, then yea uh-huh, women can use the excuse of needing special "enzymes" found in slimming products to lose weight. So if you're a guy who takes protein shakes to build-up, then don't scorn at women who use slimming products, or tell them, "You have to lose weight naturally!!" Seriously.

It's the double standards that drive me absolutely crazy.

2010-02-08T03:35:00.000-08:00

A wise man once said to me that "I would rather have a girl tell me she likes me first, than I tell her, 'cause that means that she'll try her best to make it work in everyway possible, and she'll really hold on to you. And when that happens, I'll never let her go." Well at least that's just the gist of it, cause I can't remember the exact words. Of course, "like" in this sense means really having deep feelings for one, and not just the attraction bit. But anyways. If only the wise man had been someone else.

But then again, this doesn't apply to every girl.

2010-02-06T06:16:00.000-08:00

I'm always looking forward to the end of rainbows.

'Cause that's where they say you'll find a pot of gold.

But what's the point if it all just ends up being a pot of leprechaun gold?

2010-02-04T04:49:00.000-08:00

I don't want no bad guys.

I just want a good guy.

A genuine, good guy.

I'll be happy with my good guy.

I don't care if he looks like a bad guy,

so long as he's a good guy.

I do not like bad guys,

not that much anyways.

A good guy is all I want.

A good good guy.

Hahaha awww ain't that guy goofy? =D

2010-01-23T04:13:00.000-08:00

Oh dear Lord!

What happened to all the men who (are):

Have a mind of their own/Don't do something just cause everyone else is doing it/Man enough to have a decent discussion cum arguement without swearing and giving up talking and making the girl cry/Give someone the chance to talk and actually listening and not ask them if they're done at the end/Mature enough to understand that being in love with a girl's ass or boobs is actually physical attraction and not love/Honest about their feelings in an objective and nice way/Have such intellectual conversations with you that that itself is so damn attractive/Not petty little gossip girls/Do not pretend/DO NOT have double standards/Don't sleep around and act like it's cool cause it's bloody not and you're not a stud, you're just a slut/Are able to have awesome conversations with your parents/Don't think that Saturday Nights = Clubbing/Drinking/Have the guts to make a move when they know that she actually could be the one, especially since you guys are like so freakin' close and ARE meant to be together (wait I'm not done yet!), and not have the nagging feeling that you need to go "explore" first/Can look into your eyes while genuinely thinking about nothing but you/Think with their head on their neck and not with the one at their pelvic area/AND AND GAAAHHHHH?!?!?!?!?!?

I mean ok fineeeeeee yes.....I admit that I'm just being angsty and all, and it might be just a little too much to ask of, but still, where are the guys who are at least half as decent as that?!?!?!

AND WHY THE DEVIL WAS THE MALE SPECIES CREATED TO MATURE SLOWER THAN THE FEMALE SPECIES, LEAVING US FEMALES TO MOURN AND CRY AND YELL ABOUT THE LACK OF MATURE/SENSITIVE/ACTUALLY NICE GUYS/MEN FOR AT LEAST TEN YEARS OF OUR LIVES???

WHEREFORE ART THOU?!?!?! =(

Boy, that sure was a lot of ////////////////s.

On a much lighter note.......

Hahahaha awwww isn't that adorable? =D

2010-01-06T03:43:00.001-08:00

I've been wanting to do this post for a long time, found a good opportunity, so here goes.

"A video of a woman being groped at a New Year countdown party has sparked the outrage of netizens.

The 30-second video posted on various citizen journalism platforms, Stomp and omy.sg show a woman in bikini being groped by at least four men.

The incident happened at the New Year countdown party at Sentosa's Siloso Beach at about 11pm on 31 Dec.

Deejay Daniel Ong, who co-hosted the party said the woman "mooned the crowd" prior to the incident and was "visibly high". Police said no report has been lodged over the incident."

I got this short article off The Electric New Paper website as soon as Sara told me about the incident. Now I can be very feminist, but I think sometimes we women just ask for it. I mean come on, when incidents like such happen, I don't even get as angry at the men as I do at the woman. The article states that the woman was "mooning the crowd", which means that she was exposing herself in a slutty way, and if this was really the case, then she deserved it. I mean seriously, if you display yourself as such in public, which man wouldn't want to take advantage of it?

Sometimes we females give the headstart to men, and then we cry out and say that we're being taken advantage of. First of all, respect yourself. If you display such slutty behaviour in public, then you're obviously sending out all the wrong signals to the people around you. There's a difference between having a provocative face, and actually displaying provocative behaviour. If you were minding your own business and not doing anything outrightly loose in public, and people were to pass judgements, comments, or men were to touch you, then of course that's something to be taken action upon. But if you are purposely behaving/dancing/wiggling your ass in such a manner, then are men wholly to be blamed for wanting to touch you?

I'm not heartlessly saying that the woman is in the wrong; both parties are. It's not wrong to go out and have fun on occasions whatsoever. But be mindful of yourself. I'm not only referring to this article specifically. I'm saying it on a general note. So many girls these days are going wild, and alot of cases of girls being molested or raped are being surfaced. It's so damn unfortunate if they happened to be just minding their own business or innocently walking under their block when such a horrible incident takes place. But what about those girls who purposely send out such signals in the name of "just having fun", or the ones who make themselves seem like sex kittens all over the internet? Sure you might be having fun. But no matter how much you think that it's just harmless fun, eyes watching you don't feel the same way. It can be taken as an open invite to come have "fun" with you. In which case, you're also to be blamed. Respect yourself, and all due respect will be given back to you.

It angers me to know that sometimes when guys take advantage of girls, it's also because the girls have given them the space to do so. In alot of instances, guys call girls sluts and whores, but only because the girls themselves have done something to prove that infact, that is true. I repeat, I am not saying that it's right for guys to label girls as such, but hey, if we don't give them the chance nor reason to do so, then sensibly speaking, why would they?

And as for the onlookers at the incident who just stood there and took pictures, WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU???

Respect yourself. Be mindful of the behaviour you display in public. And all due respect will be given back to you.

And if you still get guys trying to grope your ass, give them a nice, tight slap, and then make a scene.

2010-01-01T08:57:00.000-08:00

People have vastly differing opinions, thoughts, ideas, etc.

But NO. It is not true that opposites attract.

Cause in many situations, they absolutely DON'T.

In fact they drive each other quite mad.

And this is an absolutely general post by the way.

2009-12-30T02:08:00.000-08:00

Are human tears really sterile?

Cause if they are, it's a wonder how something so pure can be the result of hurt and pain.

2009-12-30T02:01:00.000-08:00

2009-12-24T20:32:00.000-08:00

I think it's time we genuinely try, and not pretend.

It draws a fine line between being fake and not.

2009-12-20T07:06:00.000-08:00

"I Wanna Be" - Chris Brown

Look, I know we've been friends for a while now.
But, I just feel like I can confess to you.
It's gonna be hard but.
Alright here it goes...

Imagine that the pillow that you cried on was my chest,
and the tissue that you wiped your face with was my hand.
Girl, imagine: if you needed advise about some other guy, I'm the one that comes to mind.
Not tryna hear you tell nobody that I'm just a friend,
just trying to make sure I'm that body that you call your man,
and anytime you need a shoulder -- it's yours, night or day,
but what I'm tryna say is, I wanna be...

The last number you call late at night (said I wanna be),
The first one that you dial when you open your eyes.
Wanna be the one you run to,
wanna be the one that ain't gonna hurt you,
I wanna be yeah, I wanna be yeah..
Be the man making your girl jealous,
be the guy shuttin' down all the fellas..
whatever you need, girl, it's all on me:
soldier, your friend or your lover, girl,
I wanna be...

Would it be cool?
Would you mind if I called you my boo,
what if the next whip you was pushin' was the one I bought for you?
Can I be the one that meets your pops and take your mama shoppin', be the only one they like?

Have you thought about it -- wait -- really thought about it?
Maybe you should take some time
call your girls and talk about it, yeah.
'cause I done already made up my mind,
don't need no more time to know if I wanna be with you,
I wanna be...

Put me on your screen saver, all over your myspace and make me one of your top favorites,
that's where I wanna be...
The one you cryin' for (stand up for and fightin' for)
wanna be your good, bad, love, hate girl..

[x2]
Cross my heart hoped to die, on everything that's good,
I'm gonna do you right, show you right, get this understood.

Girl I wanna be, I wanna be....
I wanna be, I wanna be...

When I heard this song for the first time a year and a half back, it sent that warm, tingly feeling all throughout my body. And guess what?

It still does. =)

2009-12-16T06:45:00.000-08:00

Songs that I ever so often pretend that I can sing but I actually can't so I just imagine myself singing it in my head *sob sob* :

Cater to You - Destiny's Child
Candyman - Christina Aguilera
El Beso Del Final - Christina Aguilera
Boo - Usher and Alicia Keys
Candy Man - Christina Aguilera
Single Ladies - Beyonce

And yea any other song sung by some singer with a damn powerful/mesmerising voice. *sob sob*

2009-12-14T07:53:00.001-08:00

If I could wish to be blessed with a talent, I would choose to be blessed with the talent of being able to sing well.

And if I could wish to be blessed with a voice of a celebrity, it would DEFINITELY be either of :

Two of the most talented singers ever; both can sing and dance like crazy, LIVE.

HELL YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

2009-12-14T06:04:00.000-08:00

It's only healthy to talk out things that bug you with people whom are concerned, in a well, civilised manner. It's not healthy to keep it inside of you, and mull over your own thoughts without talking about the issue with the people concerned. It's never good to bottle up emotions, cause eventually when you let it out, it's not gonna be in a proper way, and that's when nasty things which were uncalled for would happen.

So if you have something, talk about it. Not in a bitchy way. But actually talk about how to make it work. On ways to make it better. If not don't bitch about it and be so bitter about it. Move on or something. If you wanna be bitter about it and not do anything else about it, well then no one can help you.

Goodness and so many people bitching about people via the net!! Goodness!! Reading it everywhere now! I mean if you already talked about the issue with the person and are just expressing your thoughts or something general which people can learn from, then I guess it's ok. But actually bitching about people or saying hidden stuff to them when you actually know people read it?? It's either you want them to read it, or you want them to know that you're talking about them. Same difference. In that case, you're being a _______(insert word here).

Cause if you have something to say to a person, say it upfront, say it to their faces. Don't do it via the net. Just shows that you don't have the courage to say it to them and yea. It's just bitchy. So if you don't want people thinking you're scared, then talk to them properly, and don't bitch. And as much as we say we don't care about what people think of us, at least a teeny tiny portion of us does, in some ways.

You know you do.

2009-12-12T07:44:00.001-08:00

Awwwww come on...........You can't just throw out harsh words just like that and pretend like nothing happened..........

Come on............Let's not be soooo hypocritical..........

Come on............Let's not pretend............

Come on............Grow up. No seriously. Sheesh.

2009-12-08T03:43:00.000-08:00

I have found the bestest remedy ever for sore throats. And I swear it works.

Just drink like gallons of water, until you pee like every half hour or so. Until your pee comes out colourless. Just drink and pee. Drink and pee. Drink and pee. Drink and pee. And your sore throat will be allllll fineeeee the next day. =D

And when I saw that they have the new kind of Strepsils, which is actually a pain reliever, meaning it's specially formulated to numb the pain of the sore throat, the music of angels playing the harp literally played in my head in the store.

2009-12-05T22:49:00.000-08:00

I think some of us teens today are too caught up with our own little lives. Everything seems to be a problem for us. We should take the time to think and realise that some people out there, do actually have real problems. I'm not saying that the things you're unhappy about are petty. But don't make it seem like the whole world is crashing down on your shoulders and you can hardly breathe. Just take sometime and think. I mean yes, obviously everyone feels crappy now and then, it's inevitable, but so often? All the time? And for god's sake start loving yourself. Trust me, you'll feel much happier, and things around you would seem a hell lot more positive. I do not mean that life's a rainbow and we should be all smiles and make cakes out of rainbows and happiness and yada yada yada. Alot of the unhappiness that we feel, comes from our own negative thinking, that we're not good enough, that we're not this and that and blah blah blah. There's so much that is awesome about us, it's just that we don't acknowledge it, or don't take it in our stride.

Bottom line: Cheer up. Everything sucks blah blah yes whatever. But stop seeing every other thing as a hullabaloo. Start having a more positive attitude and things - not everything, but still - will start to seem a lot more better than you thought it could have. And for goodness sake, love yourself first. If not, no one will. It's true.

And well if you think no one understands you, then good luck. You're not trying at all. Or enough. You're just wallowing in self pity.

On a lighter note, awwwww ain't that baby such a cutieee? =D

2009-11-30T05:31:00.000-08:00

They say that change is the only constant.

If you say you that can't deal with the changes in people around you,
aren't you be able to understand the same
feelings that I have for you?
And everytime I get reminded of it, it sucks.

2009-11-28T06:23:00.001-08:00

I wanna be.

I wanna be the mommy who bakes the best cookies in the whole wide world.

I wanna be the wife knows her husband's mood the minute he walks in through the door.

I wanna be the best friend who knows her friend.

I wanna be the supermom who never gets tired of cleaning up her kid's crayon scribbles on the wall.

I wanna be the colleague whom they can always count on.

I wanna be the one whom my daughter turns to for advice on boys.

I wanna be the one teasing my son about his girl.

I wanna be the neighbour who always gives out flowers grown in her garden.

I wanna be the fun aunt who gives advice on sex and how you should not to do it till you're 30 and married.

I wanna be the hottie in my hunk's eyes even when I'm 50 and sagging.

I wanna be.

I wanna be me.

2009-11-26T05:35:00.000-08:00

Why is it that we get so hypocritical sometimes?

Why is it that when we use harsh words on others, we don't care, but when it happens to us, we feel hurt?

Why is it that when we stay out late, it's fine, but when our loved ones do, it's wrong?

Why is it that when we get drunk, it's purely for the sake of fun, but when people whom we care about get drunk, we get mad at them?

Why is it that when other people's sisters play around, we tell them it's all part of growing up and that we should get used to it, but when our own sisters do it, we get protective?

Why is it that we don't care about people, as much as they care about us?

Why is it that we have a rule for us, and another rule for others?

I'm sick of these double standards.

So damn sick.

2009-11-25T06:48:00.000-08:00

Don't you feel out of path when you don't know where you're going?

I mean, sure, it is fine to go with the flow once in awhile, but for how long?

I've been told I'm pretty, but not beautiful.
Not by the person(s) who truly matter(s) anyways.
Maybe I'm just not there yet then.

2009-11-23T04:36:00.000-08:00

Ok so there's this video on Youtube that Sara showed me, called the "Greatest freak out ever". It features this younger brother who video tapes his older brother, who has a TERRIBLE temper, and throws CRAZY tantrums for reasons like his mum cutting off his video games or the microwave oven not working or for being asked to vacuum the house. There're 7 such videos. When I saw the first video, honestly I thought it was hilarious, the way he was throwing a fit and doing the freakiest most craziest things ever to himself. And I was laughing till I got a tummy ache and wanted to post it up on Facebook. But after seeing the rest of the 6 videos, goodness I got so damn annoyed.

The guy is so damn freakin' spoilt! Seriously! He just screams at the top of his lungs like a madman and his parents don't do anything about it. He beats the truck that his dad got him as a present with a club and they didn't stop him. He totally destroyed the vacuum cleaner and microwave oven and got away with it. Seriously?!?! Seeing that I got totally mad, cause for one, he is so freakin' spoilt! He screams at his mum like a total crackpot and nothing! He doesn't get disciplined or anything!

Well I dunno about other kids in other households, and I might be passing judgements and it might be very subjective or whatever but frankly, I don't care. I grew up in a family where we (my sis and I) were given what was necessary, and maybe even some luxuries which other people may not have been able to afford. But my parents knew how to draw the line. We weren't pampered. We were taught how to manage with what we had, make the most out of things. As a result, even when my parents went through a pretty tough time, my sis and I learnt not to ask for anything extra, simply cause it wasn't practical to bug our parents for our little wants. It's either we saved up our pocket money and bought it or we didn't have it. As simple as that. We don't get expensive, branded goods or money from our parents whenever we wanted to go shopping. My friends ask me why my parents don't like me going out and why I always have to lie to them about going out, and yes, it frustrates me alot to not be able to go out whenever I want or be out till whatever time I want, but still, the discipline is there. I'm not doing crazy things with my friends. I don't slam doors or scream at home cause I'm pissed off cause honestly that kinda behaviour will not be tolerated for at home.

I'm not saying that that's how it should be in every house, or that my parents are the gods of parenting, or that I turned out to be an angel, or that spending money on your kids is wrong (cause it's perfectly fine), or that I have it hard blah blah blah. I don't. Ok maybe a little, but other people have it harder and their problems are different. But what puzzles me is, don't parents these days discipline their kids well? It's neither right nor wrong for the parent to say that, it's okay, he or she will learn as he grows older. But aren't you supposed to teach the kid the right thing from a young age itself? Won't the kid then be aware of what is right and what is wrong? Even if it takes sometime for him to figure it out and act upon it, it'll eventually fall in place, only if he's taught from a young age, and not left till he or she starts acting for himself, in all the wrong ways. That's why they say that a baby's growth starts in the womb itself, not only on a physical level. That's why there are so many doctors who suggest pregnant mums to listen to soothing music, feel positive things, say postive things, and talk to their babies while they're still inside the womb.

It's never too early to teach your kid anything.

And to all the spoilt brats out there who throw tantrums or sulk and sit in one corner or scream your lungs out cause your parents don't get you whatever you want or don't allow you to be however you wanna be, seriously, grow up. Goddammit just learn how to appreciate what you have. Geeez.

2009-11-18T05:22:00.000-08:00

I'm always looking forward to the end of rainbows.

I'm always trying to make it work.
I'm always trying to be the best person that I can be.
I'm always thinking there's still hope left somewhere.
I'm always wanting more and more hugs.
I'm always trying to be as practical as possible.
I'm always trying to give as much love as I can.
I'm always being honest with myself and the rest.
I'm always trying to fix things back together.
I'm always expressing myself.
I'm always being myself.

I'm always looking forward to the end of rainbows.

'Cause that's where they say you'll find a pot of gold.

2009-10-07T06:36:00.000-07:00

Sometimes we're people whom we really aren't.

We think we want to be like them, but we can't, cause we aren't.

2009-08-24T05:45:00.000-07:00

Just wondering out loud.

Is it ok to see people suffering and feel fortunate that you aren't?

It is ok that when you're in a sucky situation, you remember that someone else out there is going through something more terrible, and feel better?

2009-07-07T08:26:00.000-07:00

"There're so many fishes in the sea."

They say it like we're...........objects or something.

Oh! *gasp gasp* But wait! Does that say so much more about the fishermen than about the fishes themselves?!

Hmmmm. Definitely something to think about, if you get what I mean.

2009-07-04T08:55:00.000-07:00

"If you have to love, love now.
If you have to ask for forgiveness, ask now.
If you want to hold hands, hold it now. "
- Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna.

Beautiful lines, well said, couldn't be explained better.

There's nothing like a nice cozy afternoon, spent indoors watching a nice movie with loved ones. I mean yea I guess there are some things like that, but you know. It's just awesome. =)

2009-06-24T09:23:00.000-07:00

Credits to Flickr for the beautiful pictures.

Life. Nature. Has so much beauty to offer. And I wanna see. Feel. Touch. It all.

And no. I'm not gonna do it alone.

Definitely.

Not alone. =)

2009-05-28T07:49:00.000-07:00

Conversation between Nelly and me, on the way out of SP.

Nelly: I need to go peeeeee now!!!
Me: Now? Here? There are bushes near by.....
Nelly: Nooo....I must go pee now or I'll do it on the train!!!
Me: Hahaha yeaaa..Then the people will be like "Didn't her mommy teach her how to pee in the toilet??"
Nelly: Yes, but my mommy also taught me that if I can't hold on to it, I should let it go.

How more adorable can the Nelly get. =)

2009-05-15T05:36:00.000-07:00

She wraps her arms tightly around his neck, while he draws her even closer to his body. She rests her head on his neck, bringing her legs closer to her chest. They sit, listening to the warm silence, both knowing that the afternoon was meant to be spent in each others' arms, with only trees and insects bearing witness to it. Thunder rumbles, and raindrops start to fall, slowly trickling down their faces. He straightens himself, gets off the bench, and leads her by the hand to the patch of grass. She has always wanted to have the perfect kiss in the rain. She closes her eyes, tilts her head up to the sky, and smiles. He takes her waist in his hands and presses his lips lightly against her neck. She straightens her neck, and looks at him. Slowly stroking his face, she rests her palm on his cheek. Her cold, silver ring sends a chill down his spine. His grip on her waist tightens. She gasps a little. Their eyes close, heads tilt, and their lips part, to become one. They kiss passionately, his hands exploring the every curve on her body, while she, feels the warmth from his familiar chest, weakening by the second in his hold. Raindrops fall, heavier and heavier, travelling down their foreheads, noses, and cheeks. They go with the flow of the rain.

They gaze into each other's eyes in silence, seeing much more than just their reflections. Much has been said, and thus the lack of need for words. As the cold rain sits on their skin, they draw warmth from each other. She takes in the scent of his skin. It feels almost like a moment from a movie. He brings his face closer to hers, looking up at the raindrops which have settled in her hair, like little glass beads. One remains in her eyelash. He kisses her almond-shaped eye. She presses her body against his. She wants to be close to him in every way possible. They've always imagined this moment. "Baby, you're beautiful," he says.

By the way, I had one of the most awesome days. =)

2009-05-06T04:26:00.000-07:00

I am so so tired to blog the many thoughts running in my head.

But I'm feeling so glad.

And I would like to shout out to the world.

THAT I FINALLY FOUND A BRAND THAT CATERS TO MY BUTT SIZE!!!

Cotton On is awesome.

Duh. It has bigger sizes cause it's Australian and people have booties there. Oh well, works for me! =D

By the way, I have never blogged in this format before.

2009-04-18T01:44:00.000-07:00

YOOHOO!! Alright this goes out to all my SP mates and actually anyone who owns a laptop/notebook..If you're looking for funky laptop covers, not those borrring black ones, here they are! All of them come with soft padding, so your laptops are safe in them! They're all new and unused..My sister used to sell them and these are the extra ones! So let me know if you guys are interested!! Details of designs are below!!

Description: Black velvet material, with red satin-like material stitched underneath, to give the design of 3 circles. Zipper runs along 3 sides.

Size: 37cm by 32cm

Price: $20

Description: Brown leather-like material with red satin-like material stitched across to give a diagonal "sash" design. Zipper runs along top side of cover.

Size: 40cm by 31cm

Price: $20

Description: Black material with translucent butterfly design; red satin-like material stitched underneath to enhance butterfly design. Zipper runs along 3 sides.

Size: 37cm by 32cm

Price: $15 (SOLD)

Description: Blue denim material, with 2 orange stripes (crinkle-cut) stitched horizontally and 1 orange stripe stitched vertically. Zipper runs along 3 sides.

Size: 39cm by 27 cm

Price: $20

Description: White with black loops in different sizes. Zipper runs along top side of cover.

Size: 37cm by 30cm

Price: $15

Description: Silver material with retro black polka dots. Very stylish and funky, there's no zipper, but a very tight and secure velcro flap on top side of cover.

Size: 39cm by 27 cm(SOLD)

So please do let me know if you guys are interested! =D

2009-04-11T21:29:00.000-07:00

AND I'M BACK TO BLOGGING!!!

Haha i won't be surprised if this post never gets read, cause that's how long i haven't touched this blog, but hey i'm back! I totally miss being the "I'm gonna say what's in my head right now" kinda person that I was when i was blogging, not that I didn't say what was in my head when I wasn't blogging but anyways...One thing that's been bugging me a little, and when I saw it on the Sunday Times today I knew I had to say something.

So "S" Factor. I don't know where to start, so the stuff's probably gonna come out in bullets but anyways. As quoted by the papers, it's a show that aims to find the "ideal" woman who is "everything a guy wants". I don't see how girls running around in bikinis for more than half the show fulfills that criteria. It's as demeaning it is to guys as it is to us girls. Guys, PLEASE defend yourselves.

For one, if you're in a reality tv series, you can't blame people for passing comments on you, cause inevitably, if you're in the media, people talk, and you gotta face it. And thus I write. As much as it may seem like a strong statement, but it really is these kinda shows which does get people questioning, so what ARE Singaporean women like? Take America's Next Top Model (ANTM) for example. There're people out there who think it's too much exposure, literally, but honestly, there're talented models in that show, who trully have a passion for modelling and give it their hundred percent. It's not girls running around in little outfits being all giggly and bitchy and slapping pie on each other. Those girls are out there to prove something, and they're doing a pretty good job of it.

I won't duel on about the nature of the "S" Factor show or anything. But I would just like to say a few things. To the producers out there, the next time you create such shows, don't say it's a show which packs a bunch of girls with all the qualities that a guy wants, cause it's not. I may not be a guy but I know they go for more than that. Just put it like it is, say it's a show looking for the next sexy FHM model or something like that. And for the women out there, if you've got a hot bod AND awesome brains, go seek some other way to show the world that you're intelligent AND sexy. It's not worth getting all that crappy comments if you really do have the whole package. If not, as much as you don't wanna be bitched about, you gotta face it. It's a show aired on tv, tongues wag. So don't say we don't have the right to judge, cause eh reality tv series, WE talk.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh. It feels soooo good to put thoughts into words sometimes. =)

2008-09-21T00:29:00.000-07:00

Ahem. To all the souls who've visited this dead blog hoping to see it updated and by now given up, thanks and sorry. The brain shall be back after her Os. =)

2008-05-16T05:00:00.000-07:00

AHAH! No my blog is not doing, it's just cause i'm not using the com and doing my work instead. Hard to believe but yes. Anyways!

For one thing exams are over but the horror of the results still haunt me but i'm not gonna bore anyone with that. Watched Stomp the Yard and Dirty Dancing - Havana Nights...I must say I was pretty disappointed they killed Chris Brown in the first 11 minutes of the movie but in any case it was sorta for a good cause AND, the lead character was good as well. =D The dance was awesome as well. And as for Havana Nights...I THINK I'M NUTS OVER THE MOVIE!!! I have watched it twice in 2 days and shall watch it again tonight!!! I mean, everything's awesome, the dancing, the people, the feel, ahhhh....They honestly seem to be feeling the music while they dance (btw i went crazy and downloaded the whole awesome sound track as well)....And though it might cause a little discomfort to some people cause they seem to be touching too much while they dance, I think it's perfectly fine. The dance isn't slutty. It's amazing. It's awesome.

When you say people don't know you, it's not always cause they don't take the time to know you, or that they've understood you differently. Maybe it's cause you don't open up enough. Maybe it's cause you don't give them the chance to let them know you. Or maybe it's cause you put on a facade, pretending to be someone you're not. Sometimes people know you as much as you let them know you.

Don't come to me, especially if you're of acceptable weight or even underweight, and talk about how grotesque you look with your fats bulging out from every single part of your disgustingly fat body, or how you need to lose a hundred pounds, or how you should eat maybe just half a cracker a day. Unless you want to be sworn at real bad. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Have you ever wondered, what will happen to you if you're released from a space shuttle into space, with an oxygen tank and everything necessary to survive for at least two days, whether you would just float in mid-air, or just keep falling and falling until you never reach the bottom of space? Like does outer space have a boundary to it, like a bottom, or is it just never ending? It's kinda difficult to phrase it but yea. It's been a question I had since I was very little, and it's not been answered yet. It's a scary thought.

I guess it's kinda weird, and a few people do know, but my sister's blood group is B+, which is impossible to be produced by parents, both people with an O+ blood group. And I'm an O. I mean i know it might not strike some people the seriousness of this thing, but I'm sure the people who know a little bit of biology will be shocked. The chances of it are so close to zero, it's used in forensic sciences and all, said my sis. Haha I guess it's kinda amusing and all, and my sis has known this for a really long time. No she's not adopted. We're thinking she's switched at birth. And it's fishier cause my mum actually told her that on the same day that she was born, another indian baby girl was born in the same ward or something. And whenever the blood group topic comes up my sis gets shushed. And yes I guess it's common among people to say that you don't look like your parents or siblings and all, but honestly, my sister looks nothing like my parents. And I mean nothing. And my sis and I look worlds apart. I mean worlds apart. And she has no characteristic trait whatsoever from my parents. I look like my dad and I do actually have a few traits from them. I mean I really dunno how to express how different this is, but honestly, it's so impossible for O+ blood group parents to produce a baby with B+ blood group. My sis and I made a deal, to go for a sibling test, when we do move out of the house completely, cause my parents will probably go mad if they knew that we did such a thing. It will tell you if you're siblings, half-siblings, or not siblings at all. And I told my sis that I might go insane if I knew that I wasn't her sister. But she very calmly replied (along the lines of), "I don't think any test would change the relationship that we have between us." How true.

And in any case, if you're reading this, although I'm the one who usually says the sarcastic stuff and bullies you most of the time, I still appreciate the fact that you're not the typical nasty elder sister who struts around like she's got all the authority in the world to make the small one feel like bacteria. This is probably the only time I'll be so ickly nice towards you, but I *ahem* love you(YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!THIS IS FREAKY!!!!!!!!!!!!). Haha. And you're darn right. No sibling test is going to change what we have between us. =)

By the way, I'm sorry about the tiny scar I left on your nose after throwing the metal plate at your face when I was like one. Haha. I swear I didn't know what I was doing. ;D

2008-05-02T06:43:00.000-07:00

You know I've just been thinking, what exactly drove 50 cent to be as promiscuous as he is, and to have all that many one-night stands that he has. Maybe if he had found true love, he wouldn't be having all that many girls and one-night stands like he has now. Maybe if he actually had a woman to love him for what he really is and not all that bling and money and oh-so-exciting sex, he might be a better person ( i mean not that he isn't but you get what i mean). I know it sounds like the cliche bullshit about how all it takes is one girl to change a man (which is not the case all the time), but yea.

The world needs love. Not the"Oh you're so hot let's go out!" kinda love, not the "one-night stand" kinda love, not the one where people get paranoid just cause their other half is talking to another person of the opposite sex and not you.

True, sincere love. That's what the world needs.

But then again my definition of true love would probably be different from the rest of the world, so yea.

2008-04-30T06:26:00.000-07:00

Ok it's been freaking hot these past few days. Especially at night. Sad that I can't quite walk around the house shirtless but anyways. But technically, when you turn on the air-con and put it real low so as to feel cooler, you're actually causing the temperature of the earth to rise, due to the increased production of carbon dioxide.

And screw all you people who go, "LET'S SAVE THE WORLD BABY!", and two seconds later turn on the air-con cause it's so hot. Hypocrites.

And don't go green just cause everyone's doing it, or claiming that they're doing it. Believe in it. It's funny how people can make almost everything an "in" thing nowadays.

And it's the most beneficial thing ever to just wear green and walk around cause it's Earth Day isn't it!! I mean after all, the trees are gonna be saved and celebrate just cause you wore green now aren't they!!! *gasps*

Some things are worth the wait.

2008-04-04T06:41:00.000-07:00

It's good sometimes to take a break from all the buzz that's going around you and think about the past.

I miss the times when after kindergarten, my mum would pick me up from the bus stop and ask me what happened in class that day, and I would give her a full recount of what happened that day.

I miss the times when I used to do little cards and flowers for my mum.

I wonder what happened to the guy who gave me the stuffed toy panda in kindergarten.

And I also wonder what happened to the guy who tried to lick my tongue in kindergarten. I must say, he was kinda cute for a five year old. Haha.

I miss the times when I used to call my mum everyday without fail during recess till I was about primary 3.

I miss the times that I went on random trips to Changi Airport with my dad. We'll buy peanuts, he'll push me around in the trolley till he got tired, we'll go watch planes, he'll fall asleep, I'll eat the peanuts, he'll wake up, then we'll go get lunch, he'll take the boring straight angled pictures that most dads take, I'll get pushed around some more, and we'll go home. It was simple yet a wonderful feeling.

Sharas and I used to write letters to each other towards the end of primary 6. It worked like this. I would write her a letter and pass it to her, she'll read it, and reply back with another letter the next day. It was kiddo and all, but really fun at that time, and till now, I kinda miss those days. I was so mad when my parents found out, read them and tore them and threw them away. It apparently was a waste of time. Well thanks but now I'll have one less childhood possession to keep and to possibly show my kids.

We all have opinions. In fact it's very good to have opinions. It shows that you're actually thinking. But you gotta know when to say it and when not to. Sometimes people do not wanna hear your opinions, either because it's redundant, or it's not gonna do them any good, or it's just not nice. It'll be good if sometimes when we were to say something, we could put ourselves in their shoes, think how they might feel, if it's gonna be offensive or not, and whether it's very necessary. But sadly not all of us have the ability to think from different angles. Sucks.

Ah. I feel sorry for the people who realised the meaning of fiction and non-fiction only after they joined library. How pathetic.

Hahaha. And I think it is a known fact to everyone that my phone got no hope already lah.

2008-03-28T05:29:00.000-07:00

I HATE IT WHEN I DON'T UPDATE. IT'S LIKE I'M LETTING MY BLOG DIE. BUT IN A WAY IT'S GOOD CAUSE IT MEANS I'M NOT SPENDING MUCH TIME ON THE COM. =)

Don't say I didn't warn you...This is gonna be a looong post..So yup...A whole lot has happened in the month but i shall start off with today...

Today's the day we stepped down from CCA!!! Ahhhhhhh....Man it just struck us seniors how sucky it feels to leave ATC...I mean we've all been like a huge family together...And yea...Gaahhh...Haha but today was so sweet...It feels good to know that people are actually gonna miss you...Thanks to all the juniors and teachers for making this such a memorable experience in anderson...And to Praveena..Haha i know it sucks that we have to take our Os this year but yea...We'll always see each other around school and all...And Carmina! Haha it was sweet to see you cry...But take care of yourself woman! EAT!!! =D

AND....I think us seniors did the best Passing Out Parade (POP) ever...I know you're thinking how the hell did Drama do a POP but oh just watch this.

Haha ah we took it in literal context and passed out. It should be a tradition or something. That we invented of course. =D Oh and Mrs K, we missed you so much and it was sad that you couldn't be there for our last ATC session...But do get well soon!

As few of us know, love has nothing to do with the heart whatsoever. It's all about the chemical balances thingy in your head, which makes you attracted to a certain person. Ah yesterday's Tyra Bank's programme was so cool...So it went like this...Tyra got a girl who just kept getting into the wrong relationship and was sick of it and all to come over...And there was this love-chemist person (i dunno her exact occupation), who was extremely well educated in matters of love and all to help her choose an eligible bachelor whom she might be attracted to through tests which involved the five senses...She was blindfolded so she couldn't see them...So there were 3 guys...1st one was rather cool...2nd one was more professional/smart looking...And the 3rd was Mamamia...All crew cut and tall and !!!!!!!!! So anyways, the first test was for her to smell the tees of these three guys who've worn it for 2 nights straight without cologne or anything..And choose which funky smell she's attracted to..And the second was the sense of touch..Haha the guys had to touch her like how they would in public...Haha the first one gave her a massage..The second one did like a arm/back caress..And the third one (!!!) haha did like a arm caress cum squeeze thingy which was hot but haha she chose the 2nd one..And the third was the sense of hearing...they each had to read a nursery rhyme to her...the first two were fine but the 3rd one (!!!!!!!!!!!!!) had a oh-so-sexy voice...I'm telling you...Ahhh...haha and it's cause of high testosterone levels which is usually combined with broad shoulders and all..so she picked the 3rd one..and the sense of taste...haha they each had to suck a lollipop and let her suck it...she chose number one...And lastly it was sense on sight...she took off her blindfold and *drumroll* she picked the 3rd one cause he seemed the most appealing to her (btw he had the brad pitt kinda look)...and the love expert was expecting it cause they had compatible profiles and all...so yup...Really interesting how chemistry of all things play a part in love...AHAH! That's why they say "We've got chemistry"! Makes more sense now...

Sometimes, you just can't please everyone. When you keep doing a certain favour for someone and there's a time when you can't, and the person starts to get all touchy and all, don't worry. You just gotta put it to the back of your head and go on with your stuff. Cause these people just don't understand that people can't be running after them all the time, tending to their needs. No matter what you do, they're still gonna remember the time you didn't help them, in contrast to the numerous number of times you've helped them. People do have their own obligations, their own life to tend to. You just can't be too nice all the time.

Like the world knows that you might be a shallow person and all but it does also believe the you do have a not so shallow side to you. Unfortunately, you tend to want to show the dense part of you most of the time. I actually wonder if the only deep thing that you can think of is the sea. Sigh. Feel rather sorry for you.

Hahahaha. You know like the family songs and all where the dad sings the song and his lost kids appear from nowhere, this is between Poorani, Janani and I.

Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!
Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!
Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!
Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!
Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!
Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!
Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!
Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!
Poorani: (in a high pitched grandma voice) Kia?
Me: Kaun hai?
Janani: Nahin nahin nahin nahin nahin!

And we just go on till we annoy the crap out of people. Ah. Fun.

It feels good to blog after such a long time cause you kinda get stuff out of your head. But it sucks as well cause there's more i wanna say but forgot about. Anyhow, thanks for taking time to read such a long post. =D

It's not wrong to point out people's flaws. But when you do it on a regular basis, do expect some to come back your way. And when it does, DON'T SULK. Cause you're merely getting back what you gave.

2008-02-29T05:26:00.000-08:00

I'M BAAAACK!!!

Haha for the people who checking my profile to see if i've updated and then gave up i'm so sorry...Just that so much has been happening now that it's kinda difficult to sit and blog..But anyways...

9 weeks into school and i'm doing badly..I shall not talk about it now though..Let's talk happy thoughts..

So much has happened in this year...Ah some of which wouldn't be appropriate to blog about, but like i always say, everything happens for a reason.

Valentine's was fun. I loved baking cookies for everyone (though it took a freaking long time to pack them). It was a happy valentine's.

Saranya is muscle woman. She can actually piggy-back me. Wow.

And yesterday! Ok so drama Os people are doing a devised group piece for the Os...And mine (as i've mentioned sometime earlier in my blog) is about war...And this family affected by war...As for me I play a sadistic evil character who talks and looks scary...And eats bugs...And tortures herself...It really is quite funny because the whole family has characters with very different personalities...It's VERY amusing. Jacq Koh actually got scared by my role. But anyways. The thing is, we had this activity, where people from the other group (which is doing abuse) and the war people form pairs, one from each group, and we have to take turns to lead each other by our palms. And the thing is, the person leading someone, the someone's face must at all times follow the person's palm, no matter how low the person brings his palm down, or in whatever position you must be in to follow the palm. So ultimately it was like one person had the power to lead the other by just his palm, and you could do whatever you want. For everyone except me, it felt degrading and like someone was controlling you but you couldn't do anything to stop it, which frustrated them so bad, but I was the only one who thought it was fun, just like how my character would feel. I could just say that I'm as disturbed as my character, or really sit down think about why I enjoyed the "control"...And what's the most ironic thing is that I am the kind of person who would fight for her rights and voice out my opinions and not just crumble if someone tries to take control over my life and blah blah...But it's really quite interesting why I didn't try resisting the control and pressure, despite the fact that there was music that sounded like judgement day or something going on in the background...Hmmmm...For those of you who think drama is just mindless script reading and isn't gonna hep you in life, screw you. Drama makes you reflect upon yourself, and more than often, we discover a whole lot about ourselves through drama. After all, drama is a form of expression, and the more you express, the more you learn about yourselves.

Some people obviously do not mature with age.

Ah. Haha. The JI guy who escaped. Hahaha. Wonder how he did it. With all that high security that he's been getting, it's a wonder how he managed to get out. With a limp. Unless OF COURSE...Hahaha.

Oh btw, has anyone given a thought as to maybe there's an underground passageway that he might have used to escape?

Hahaha. The gods must be crazy.

"If you really love a person, let them go. If they come back, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were meant to be." - Anonymous.

2008-01-04T05:40:00.000-08:00

And to my relief my com's all fine again. Happiness. K no wait. Happiness!!! Ah that sounds better. So anyways.

Hmm lessons have been interesting so far. I particularly like english, haha cause our teacher's interesting..And today being the 2nd lesson, we did do something really cool. Well yea at first when she handed out this article I thought it was some boring article about the Singapore education system or something ( I mean not that it's boring or anything but anyway)..But then it turned out to be something really interesting..Which actually made the class read in silence..It's about Grace Quek, aka Annabel Chong, whom some of you might have heard of..Ok so she's a Singaporean girl who's a porn star now, and she's gone up to international levels..so she is a big deal..and this girl's had sex with 251 men in 10 hours and set a record..Well ok at first when I read it in my mind I was all like God!! Craziness!! 251 men in 10 hours!!! That's like 2min per man!!! THAT'S SICK!! But ok I understood more when I read on...For starter's, she was from Raffles Girls' and then Hwa Chong Institution, with teachers for parents, and she was to study law in London after her As and then return to a prestigious law firm back here..But when she was in London, she didn't like the way life was turning out to be, and on top of that she got raped and robbed in London, which led her to leave law school, and enrol in an art school to work as a nude model to play her tuition..And then when she moved to the US, she just started experimenting everything, including promiscious sex and drugs..And then later on she responded to a newspaper ad for nude models, which led her to a porn director who gave her a role in a porn movie, and yea that's how her whole career started..And in the article, she says that she got into the porn industry, firstly cause she likes sex (obviously), and she wants to do something different, outrageous, something new that's not a borrowed experience. And this part really makes you think ( ok well it made me think)..In the article she says, "Annabel Chong is a persona. She's a character that I created as an outlet to express a certain part of Grace Quek that Grace Quek did not have the opportunity to express in daily life. I have smashed the idea of a nice Chinese middle-class going to college..and Annabel Chong is more like a breakout moment...where I'm saying, I'm taking this persona, let's see where this persona takes me...I think they have split up into even more permutations. There's now Annabel Chong the porn director, Grace Quek, and there's Grace the documentary filmmaker, Grace the documentary subject, and then there's the Grace the artist back in LA...That brings us to the idea of personality. Are we who we are? Are we ever ourselves or do we continously change? And if we do, then we're continually moving from one persona to another anyway. So maybe the real Grace Quek has never existed!"

So yup. That really made me think. Ok well I guess putting all my morals aside, and thinking from a third person's point of view, I think that what she did was neither wrong nor right. I mean yes except for the part where it's not healthy and stuff which my sis just told me about but I forgot, I would not quite look down upon her. Cause in my opinion, everyone has a different way of expressing themselves. You can't quite say that oh! that is such a great way of expressing yourself and no! that's just gross can't you do something else, cause in the end, everyone of us are comfortable with different ways of expression. Maybe through this, she might just understand herself better than other means of expression. And weird as this sounds, sex is her passion and all she wants to do is find different ways in which she can so called nuture her passion, which I think is not a wrong thing to do. But then again from a person close to Annabel or a relative, I do think I would be disgusted initially, but gradually I might get used to it or something..Well I don't know about from a relative's point of view but from a third party's point of view, I don't exactly think what she did is wrong. I do have alot of things going on in my head right now but I don't quite know how to put it all out in words.

Oh well. I guess in this issue, it's just all about opinions. And perceptions. But I also do feel that we should not use our own ideas of morals to support our opinions (yes it is quite a contradictory statement, but i meant it to be that way). And certainly not religion.

And also, compared to the bigger things that are going on in this world, this doesn't quite seem like a big sin to me.

But then again it's hard to please everyone.

And thanks to my english teacher for giving us this article today. It's really quite an eye-opener.

2007-12-21T21:44:00.000-08:00

Ahah! Ok to the people who have been checking my blog to see if I've been blogging, the reason why I'm not updating my blog is cause my com's screen blew up and yea...I kinda feel naked without going online or blogging but oh well. So yea me blog's gonna be abit dead for some time. Sigh.

I think I'm kinda sick of watching mtv. Sometimes I feel like more and more singers are getting tans and the same kind of hair and body and yea. I mean, look at Paula Deanda. Cassie. Chenelle - the girl who sang "I fell in love with the dj." Yes they do make nice songs but after a while it kinda gets boring cause it gets quite repatative. Ok at least for me. Oh well. And programs like want a famous face, god it's crazy. But entertaining. Definitely.

And I so hope no indian serial writer from india who writes stuff for suntv reads this but...wait. What are the chances anyways? Ok nvm. I think these serials should be destroyed or burned or whatever. And if I get lucky, the whole suntv system thingy should go KABOOM. For as long as I'm out of my house. I'm starting to go nuts i tell you. NUTS. I swear.

Have you ever wondered if,
God created Man, or Man created God?

2007-12-01T05:04:00.000-08:00

I feel like my blog's dying. BUT NO! It's not! Haha just that sometimes I'm a little lazy to type that much. Anyways.

Firstly, I would like to express my great detestation, abhorrence, revulsion, hate, and odium for suntv serials (don't mind me just am in the mood for big words). For those of you who don't know, suntv happens to be a tamil channel, from india, which is on cable tv. For those of you who do know suntv, you probably might feel the same, when it comes to the nasty little dramas. Each one lasts for like 20 minutes, and one is no different then the other. EVERYTHING has got to do with family problems, how the mother-in-law plots against the daughter-in-law, or how a nasty person spends all his/her life, plotting against a really really nice person, making their lives miserable, etc. Now the new trend is for the serial to revolve around one particular woman, whom bears all the problems that could possibly ever happen in a family, and still be a nicey nice nice person. What's up with that? I swear, the serials harp on the same things, same old silly issues and they move at snail's pace. A person could be getting married on monday, and the wedding would only be done on friday. Gosh. And by the time they go back home, it'll be wednesday. And what are the learning points from these serials. NONE. I actually think they give ideas to the people who watch them on how to corrupt a family or, to relate those events to their family stuff and just aggravate the issue. And I forgot. There's this game show on suntv for couples. It's basically to build bonds between them. This is one crackpot game show, which actually makes the couples fight, as part of the few games they play, AND give them money based on how well they fight. HAH. It's torture. Trust me.

And we had CCA open house last saturday. ATC made puppets! Don't quite know how it went but I guess it would have been ok. And for my puppet....*drum rolls* (ok it's not that magnificent but wth)

Ah. You may look at it at think it's such a nice little happy girl. Aww look at her all bright and yellow with a (sick) smile on her face.

Ahah! But she's not! She's a devil now! Look at the beady little evil eyes, her chain all ripped and her buttons all over the place! Ok so my puppet's a girl with split personality. Pretty cool concept huh? Haha. My sister says I made myself. Haha. Ok but no that's not me.

You know some people do have twisted little opinions about love. Or twisted little ways in which they express their love. They might get so possessive over you. They don't like you talking to other people of the opposite sex. They want you to be by their side 24/7, and if you don't, oh boy do they get mad. They use insulting little swear words on you. And sometimes they care only about how they feel being in that relationship. All in the name of love. You know for one, when you say you love a person, you shouldn't only like them for who they are on the outside, cause that's not love. That's just physical attraction. You should actually take them for who they are, and be in love more with the inside then the outside. And for god's sake, don't use vulgarities on the person you so called really love, cause guess what? It hurts. And I'm talking about the times when you're in a real heated arguement, not the "play-play" times. I mean, if you think of the person as a (insert insult here), then why go out with the person? And please. As much as the person is in a relationship with you, the person has his/her own life, his/her own obligations. Being in a relationship doesn't mean dedicating his/her WHOLE LIFE to you. And when people start talking about your partner, it would be nice if you just talk about it nicely to your partner, or you should know your partner well enough to gauge if he/she is really like that, or would have done that. Don't start making nasty little assumptions, and attack the person one fine day when you have a fight. And. If the relationship doesn't work, take it like a man(or woman) and walk away. Don't keep bugging the person to patch back, cause that's just plain annoying. It kinda makes you look really desperate. Everything happens for a reason. In this case it just wasn't meant to be. I mean, think about it as a learning experience. You would have learned some things about people or relationships or whatever, and if you take it in a good light, it'll definitely help you grow as a person. Sheesh. You might think that the older you grow, the more mature you get, but with some people it isn't that way. To the people who just read all that, don't worry, I'm not in a difficult relationship whatsoever. Just some random thoughts. Oh and teachers, haha, don't worry.

My sister got high on vaseline. She rubbed it on her face (it's good moisturiser by the way), lips, and elbows. And then she started laughing like a maniac. And then she asked me if I've ever wondered how it would be like to throw sheep at each other. And then she enacts the act, which sheep noises (BAAAAAAAAAAA). And then she laughed somemore. And then she started reading her book out loud, which I found quite wierd at that moment. Haiz. Oh well. Even if we don't look like sisters at all, that's least that's one thing we've got in common. Ok and a few other things as well but yea.

Sometimes you just wanna forgo certain phases of your life. It's just too tiring, too vexing, too much to handle. But too bad. Life doesn't work that way.

2007-11-21T06:50:00.000-08:00

A random thought. An ant crawls on you arm. You hit your arm, killing the ant. Or it runs across your homework. You squash it with your index finger. Have you ever paused for a bit, to wonder why you just killed the ant? I mean think about it. It probably didn't know where it was going, or had no intention of running up your arm, but somehow just landed there. It isn't even a pest or rodent which spreads germs. So why did you just kill it? Cause it was small? It's unimportant? Cause you think, Oh c'mon it's just a stupid ant? Or is it just human nature? I've asked myself this a thousand times but haven't found an answer. But I guess sometimes we tend to take little or no notice of small objects, thinking they serve no purpose in life. Well, ultimately, they do. In one way or another.

And I find this one funny. Remember when you look at a cockroach you go all like, "Ugh that hideous creature get rid of it!" Ahah. Have you wondered what it thinks of YOU? Probably is thinking, "OH SHUT UP the feeling's mutual."

And for now, I think I like this song.

RIHANNA FEAT. NE-YO
HATE THAT I LOVE YOU

2007-11-17T05:54:00.000-08:00

Ah. And today was the day of my dance exam. For those of you who don't know, I learn indian classical dance at Temple of Fine Arts (TFA). So anyway, I was with my class people, and I think I did rather badly, but the examiners said we all did well. Ah. I still have room for ALOT of improvement though. Haiz. So anyways about the examiners.

They were exterminal examiners from KL. 3 people. A lady and 2 guys. One of the guys. Looked. Like. FRAKIE J. OMG. OMG. OMG. I totally wanted to hyperventilate and die but no I couldn't do that. Haha and no I didn't think of him the whole time I danced. I actually concentrated on my dance. So anyway, he had the same face shape as FJ, same head shape of FJ, had a ear piercing like FJ ( wasn't a bling though), and practically same almost everything. I might not sound too excited here, but seriously I am. Like in facebook, if blogger had funny functions like hyperventilating or something, I would so put it here. He's chindian by the way. And if I'm not wrong he does salsa too. Sigh. I finally found a FJ look-alike but noooooooo, he's got to be much older AND a dance pro. God has funny ways of playing around with people. I'm gonna blame it all on karma. There's no chance of my dance teachers reading this, but i still hope they don't come across this. That'll be embarrassing. And I should stop ranting about the guy.

Sigh.

I envy that girl.

2007-11-15T06:01:00.000-08:00

And I'm finally updating. Just that I've been pretty lazy to update all this while, not that anything interesting happened anyway. Oh wait. Deepavali was fun! Ate lots and now I gotta squeeze into my jeans. Oh well.

I'm scared for my dance exam, which is on Saturday. I must pass this and get on to the next stage. Ah. And my stamina sucks. Anyways.

Titanic beats Romeo and Juliet anyday. At least in my opinion it does. I mean practically speaking, I found it more romantic, sincere, and mature than Romeo and Juliet. Romeo and Juliet met, fell in "love" (or what I would call physical attraction), got married, had sex, and died, all in a day and a half. Jack did find Rose attractive, but then again he didn't go off proposing to her the next minute. They got to know each other over the period that they were in Titanic, and I must say, Jack did have a good view on life, and knew how to live it. If you ask me, I think that's what made Rose fall in love with him. The fact that a man takes life as it comes and makes each day count, just makes him that much more attractive. So anyway, they really did understand each other, which means they did fall in love, not just physical attraction. And even when Jack died, Rose didn't go killing herself, and instead mustered up all the willpower she had, to live, cause she had promised Jack to survive, no matter what happened, or how hopeless the situation got. And I love Rose for that, cause it's hard to have the willpower to survive when you're in the middle of a deep, cold, dark ocean, with just a wooden plank to hold on to, and you're practically freezing to death. That woman's strong. So yes, I never quite liked sappy romance stuff, but this one was good. There's alot of other things I wanna say about this but I can't quite get the words right now. And again, I think Romeo and Juliet is shallow.

2007-10-24T06:25:00.000-07:00

Arts Fest today was great. And the fact that be yourself day was combined with it made it even better. ATC did good for Cluedo and squareroot 64 was good too!! Congrats girls! And here are some of the pictures.

That's Saranya in her Mrs X ( Cluedo) get-up, and me, of all places in the home econs room.

The gardener and the detective.

The scene where Mrs X gets interrogated.

The maid commits suicide.

Haha. Lakshmi's being all "Yo Momma". Or rappy.

Squareroot 64 working their thang!! And they won!!

There's definitely a kid in her.

And that's what Mon looks like when we talk about...ahem. Haha.

Walking down the area where they keep the baby stuff in kiddy palace just makes me excited. As weird as it sounds, I'm kinda excited to be a mum. The part which excites me most is the thought of walking down the aisles pregnant, with my husband, choosing baby powder, picking up kiddy clothes, getting a nice looking feeding bottle, and well, just being happy about the fact that we're gonna have a kid in like 2 months. I know I'm a little crazy and all thinking about it now, but it'll be fun. Oh well, loooooooong way to go.

I wonder why they named hot dogs hot dogs.

Haha to Mon and Aliya, I'm sorry if I took long to eat my Hot Fudge Sundae, but I just have to eat my ice cream and fudge separately. I don't like the fact that the fudge is on top, cause I wanna leave the fudge for last, and eat the ice cream first. I think next time I'll ask them to put the fudge at the bottom, so i can eat the ice cream first and save the best for last. =D

And they named Betty Boop Betty Boop for a reason.

2007-10-22T06:34:00.000-07:00

Ah. Everytime I see the blank space we get to blog stuff in, I start wondering how long my posts are gonna be. And how meaningful they're gonna be. Ah. Random thought. Anyways.

It's been quite a week, what with all that MT O level remedials and oh no! I'm not gonna think of results today. Noooooooo. Sucks. My results I mean. But anyway it's been pretty fun as usual with all that jokes and stuff which just make peoples' days. That's one reason why I like going to school. Seeing people whom make my day. Aka friends. Haha. =)

Ok, I don't get the whole "I hate you cause you got better marks than me" thing. Ok look. It's your problem, your wen ti (hope i got that right) , your pasal, your prechanai, that you didn't put in at least your 80% for your exams, and thus produced such results. You can't blame the person who did well for doing well, or ruining your life blah blah, cause that's just ridiculous, and childish if you ask me. So yes. We should instead be happy for people who do well, and encourage them, not discourage them for goodness sake. However much you might say you put in your best but didn't achieve much, it just means that well, there's room for more effort to be put in. Yup. I'll take this as a note to self as well.

Minu. Is a funny, whacky, conked out person. She tells the wierdest/funniest yo mamma jokes, half of which make you wanna knock yourself real hard. Here's 2 jokes she told today. Not yo mamma jokes but anyways.

Q: What do you call a bunch of bunnies hopping backwards?
A: A receding hair line.

Q: What do you call a person who poisons cornflakes?
A: A cereal killer.

As much as these jokes make you wanna bang your head against a wall or even better bang Minu's head on the wall, they're still funny. In a wierd twisted way. And it's part of the little stuffs that make your day. I love that woman for that. =D (ugh why am i being so nice to MINU of all people? *shudders*)

When it happens to rain, especially at night, go to the window, open it, and stand there. The wind will blow and some rain will spray on your face. It's a wonderful feeling.

2007-10-15T07:13:00.000-07:00

Mon and me had a pretty interesting conversation online today. It was funny actually. We went on about our different moms, mine who doesn't want me to be out and hers who wants her to be out. Mine who doesn't want me to have a boyfriend and hers who WANTS her to have a boyfriend. I'm telling you mon, one fine day your mum's gonna start hooking you up with long lost friends' sons or something. Haha that'll be hilarious. But at this point in time I wanna say something. I mean ok, to all the parents out there, if you don't want your kids to go out now, don't want your kids to hang out with friends now, don't want them to use the computer to do fun stuff, then would they do all these? When they're old and graying with three kids running around the house like maniacs? I mean ok if you know your kids aren't quite the disciplined ones who are capable of creating havoc, then yes it's understood. But what about the more disciplined ones (hint hint..haha)? SUCKS.

And I think kids should be trained from a young age to eat everything that's on their plate. Come to think of it, eating habits of kids solely come from their parents' trainings. If your kid doesn't eat their vegies, and you say, oh ok I'll let you off this time but next time you better eat it, you can forget about it. Cause the next times would just keep building up, and in 5 years time, your kid's gonna hate vegies for life. But instead, if you make sure your kid eats everything on his/her plate, they're not gonna have eating problems, which of course would be a good thing in the long run. Yup.

I might have said this a gazillion times before, but I just can't stop stressing on it. If you stop finding so many things to complain about, and instead try feeling a little more positive about the stuff that you have or happens, life would SERIOUSLY be a happier place to live in. It sucks to be around people who can't see that.

2007-10-11T05:32:00.000-07:00

Ok so today was the day of the drama assessment and man was it awesome. We gotta say, in a short period of time, we did a pretty good job for work in progress. And i must say, Afiqa's and Sof's play was really touching..haha it made mrs kamal cry! Yup so to all of us, good job guys!! Haha we're good seniors. =D Last friday's trip to the library was good. I borrowed 2 books on the sisterhood of travelling pants, a book on what muslims believe, and a book on 366 readings of hinduism. I must say I looked abit loony walking around with quite a different combination of books, but I was curious. Very curious about what the 2 religions had to say. I haven't read it yet but caught a little glimpse of it, and i shall not blog about it as my very opiniated brain might get me into alot of trouble.

Sometimes you start to wonder why people interpret things in a different way. Sometimes they take it in a good light, but most of the times they tend to take it in a very bad light. Sometimes the things said or happened might not have intended what you think they might have intended, and thus you start making assumptions. Assumptions which make you very unhappy. All this can seriously be avoided if you start learning how to see things(well most of it at least) in a positive angle, or in a wider perspective, and try to make the best out of the worst. I mean, what's the point in being unhappy and wallowing in self-pity? Talk it out. Try to sort things out. And even then if you're gonna sit there and just give up and not be open-minded, you've only got yourself to blame. Honestly. I read in a book today. The problem is not the problem. The problem is the attitude towards the problem. How true.

Sometimes, looking beyond the teachings of a book might just bring you further in life.

2007-10-09T08:05:00.000-07:00

WHOOPEE!! I'M FINALLY FIFTEEN!! ok may not be something that great but hey it's not everyday u have a birthday..so although i don't quite like it when pple blog about what they do every single moment of the day, i think i might do it cause today has been a happy day. VERY HAPPY DAY.

Ok so first i woke up of all people to sara's message(haha) and yes i must say it was a rather sweet one(to sara: see i'm mentioning you) and it made me happy...woohoo!! and then afiqa's message..thanks alot girl!! she's made me really happy too!!

and then i went to skool and yay! i got a letter from afiqa which by the way was so so sweet and funny!! at this point in time, i would like to say i love you! to afiqa. genuinely. haha...

and then i got a bag of foodstuffs which make me happy! haha i got satay broad beans, the fake smarties thingies which u have to pop and eat, the chocolate wafer thingies, the little biscuits with coloured sugar icings on top, annnnnnddd a DOUGHNUT!! I swear i felt like a little kid but hey i was one happy person! thanks so much to everyone for all that especially the doughnut!! i really appreciate it!

and then ok we had drama and stuff and me and aliya stopped by cold storage to look for candles for our play..and we ended up buying things from the $1 machines which have stuff in capsules. aliya got this chick in a cracked egg while i got a bouncy bright green ball...and i also bough a watermelon flavoured pushpop which cover was bright green to match the ball! ok i'm sorry i sound abit crazy but i enjoyed every moment of it.

and then i had a good lunch(vegetarian chicken rice which my mom made) and birthday cake which was coffee cake(also which my mum made) and yea i practically ate the whole day but it feels good...

and now i dunno what to say cause most of it just has got to do with me being happy and all...and oh my parents and especially my sis thought i was nuts cause i was going all happy over the presents and the ball...

oh and i also had a maths test which as much as i think i should be positive, i know i'm gonna fail but nevermind i'll worry about that abit later...

so yes i'm sorry if i bored u people but i had a really nice day and yes i was acting like a five year old but it was nice in a way...sometimes u just wanna go back to being a kid...yup..

and to all the people out there who wished me and made my day and stuff thanks alot!! i really appreciate it alot! and afiqa, you're one funny person as well as a nice person to message.. =D

ok and here goes...haha sara you wanted me to say something about you and i shall...ah thanks so much for being there for me throughout like the whole year...it's funny when we first knew each other you thought we wouldn't last for 2 weeks but it's lasted for such a loooong time now..and i'm gonna hate myself for being so nice but i really really appreciate you...like alot...and just don't die anytime soon, i'll so be void of something ( i hate myself). and what else, hmm i dunno but i just wanna say alot of thanks-es for i dunno what...haha u're a good person..stay that way..oh and pls remember your kids' birthdays if u have kids cause if u were my dad and u forgot my birthday, i would so hate you. and the message was sweet. thanks. haha u be happy that i'm being so nice and blogging about you. i hate myself. haha.

yes good day it has been and gee i can't wait to be 16! ah nc16 movies..oh well i can sneak into the theatre now( i think) but i'll be a good girl...ah so that's it and i'm sorry if i rattled on too much about crap! oh and damn i couldnt upload pictures of my cake and stuff but i'll do it another time. =D

2007-10-04T06:20:00.000-07:00

And we're almost done with the exams, except for the A maths and Bio part (damn)....Ah I don't even wanna think abt the results and instead am going to look forward to the 6 day holiday..

Push-pop spree has got to go on. Had 2 last week and none so far this week. Shall buy one tomorrow! Anyways....

Ok to all my fellow O level drama people, I wanna say something. It makes me really happy to be around you people, and I mean it. I really am happy that we share this close bond among us, and yes even after we graduate (which we shall not think about right now cause it's kinda depressing), we are gonna go watch plays together ok. And Mrs Kamal, you're the most awesome drama teacher I've ever met so far, and I'm sure it's not gonna change in a long time. I really really admire you, cause I dunno, it's hard to explain. You just make us feel loved and comfortable. Yup. =D

Ok so I'm not gonna say no offence cause I don' quite care if any of u happen to take it personally, but what's up with the friendster profiles which go all "I am loud, sacarstic. (and all that negative bitchy personalities) I have my own rules don't try to rule me blah blah...I am who I am I don't care what you think of me blah blah..."? Ok maybe it doesn't seem that annoying or bitchy the way I describe it, but sometimes seeing those bold letters and all that arrogance put down in words, it just drives you nuts. Especially when they say stuff like don't hate me cause you ain't me. Ok if u're the kind of person who does that and is reading this, here goes. We don't hate you cause we ain't you. Cause guess what? We're quite happy we ain't you, what with all the arrogance and bitchy-ness. It infact just makes you look like a know-it-all, and sometimes even like one of those immmature teens who think the whole world revolves around them. Err reality check: IT DOESN'T. Sometimes, if you wanna show that u're really that strong girl who doesn't quite care about what the world thinks of her, being nice but firm would put across the message real well. Ah yes. I definitely feel better now. I might be too harsh but hey, someone's gotta tell them.

And haha...Sof, I'll wait till the 31st to get my magnum. Thanks Khairi for finding the loophole in the bet I had with Sof. =D

I've realised that every nov/dec hols has had something new in store for me in one way or another. Let's see what happens this year.

2007-09-25T07:31:00.000-07:00

Noooooooo.....Exams are like next week (SHIT SHIT SHIT!!!) and I feel desperate. Gaaahhh. I miss the days when you didn't quite have to crack your head to do a exam paper and score full marks. well almost. And you could actually come home proud with the report card. Man I miss being *ahem* smart.

I had push pop today! Ok i don't understand the people who stare at you like u're some wierdo when u tell them u've had push pop. is it really that wrong to relive your childhood? It's a really good sweet, fun to eat, and it makes one happy. It made me happy. =D

(do you see the glow??? well that's actually the flash but oh well it makes the sweet look happy. think bright white light shining on the push pop, like some glow from heaven. i dunno if that made sense but nvm.)

Sometimes you wonder why people don't listen. Especially in a relationship. And by relationship i mean any kind of relationship. When involved in a relationship, when u don't listen to what one another, you don't quite understand what the other person's thinking. When you don't understand what the other person's thinking, you tend to make assumptions. More than often, the assumptions you tend to make are kinda screwed, cause you obviously don't understand the person. And when you make negative assumptions, you tend to get unhappy. This might be the reason why relationships end up unhappy. Cause you don't communicate well. Or rather, you refuse to communicate, cause you don't wanna hear two sides of the story, or try to relate to another person's opinions/feelings. That's why I say, understanding one another and communication are key to a good relationship. Sometimes it is that really easy to build a good relationship. But most of us don't see it. Or sometimes, most of us don't wanna see it.

It's funny how sometimes, it's really cold, and someone comes along and makes you feel really warm, just like that.

2007-09-20T06:01:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I actually forgot to post about Ratatouille. Watched it with my sis during the september hols and it was seriously a good movie..it had a really simple storyline potrayed in a really nice manner...so here's the synopsis:

In the hilarious new animated-adventure, Ratatouille, a rat named Remy dreams of becoming a great chef despite his family’s wishes and the obvious problem of being a rat in a decidedly rodent-phobic profession.

When fate places Remy in the city of Paris, he finds himself ideally situated beneath a restaurant made famous by his culinary hero, Auguste Gusteau. Despite the apparent dangers of being an unwanted visitor in the kitchen at one of Paris’ most exclusive restaurants, Remy forms an unlikely partnership with Linguini, the garbage boy, who inadvertently discovers Remy’s amazing talents. They strike a deal, ultimately setting into motion a hilarious and exciting chain of extraordinary events that turns the culinary world of Paris upside down.

Remy finds himself torn between following his dreams or returning forever to his previous existence as a rat. He learns the truth about friendship, family and having no choice but to be who he really is, a rat who wants to be a chef.

Oh oh oh...I gotta say...The food looked like REAL FOOD...It was goooood....

And now I shall sing three blind mice.

Three blind mice,
Three blind mice
See how they run,
See how they run!

They all ran after
The farmer's wife
She cut off their tails
With a carving knife
Did you ever see
Such a sight in your life
As three blind mice?

Ah. That definitely made me happier. =D

2007-09-19T06:58:00.000-07:00

It's been sooooo long since I posted and I've forgotten most of I've wanted to say but I'll post anyway.

When it comes to school, I guess it's the usual boring stuff. Homework maths chem failing yada yada. It's so mundane I'm starting to dislike it. Haiz. And I used to love school btw.

Us kids should get a life outside school cause we're kinda missing out alot on our childhood. I mean what happened to people our age hanging out during the weekends, doing fun stuff like swimming, watching movies, and just well, plain having fun? Oh I forgot. Homework. That's what's happening to us.

Over the weeks, I've read and heard so much about the world going to end. And I'm starting to find it way interesting. Some think that there'll be a whole revolutionary thing gonna take place, which might be possible. And then there are the natural disasters which happen every now and then, which are interpreted as signs of the world going to end. Which I agree with. Oh but then there's karma. Here's what I think.

The world's gonna end pretty soon I guess, but I feel its for karma's sake. Everybody has to payback for their deeds, and I think that eventually everyone would be reborn in a new world, to payback for their deeds in the past life. It kinda makes you think (if you believe in karma of course), what the kids in Africa might have done to deserve all that crap their going through now. For that, I guess we have to be thankful for what we have now, cause in this world, as long as you have ample food to live on, clothes to wear, and a roof above your heads, you're pretty lucky. But if u're thinking of the living conditions you're in now (hint hint), that's a whole new story. Ah. No offence but I'll hail Indians for coming up with the word "karma". It's one of the best words they/we have ever come up with.

I'm starting to get worried about final years, but I shall tackle it with a cool head.

And I can't wait for the movie marathon (of horror movies) I'm gonna have with my cousins during the hols!!! Shall pray that nothing screws up.

There's alot more I wanna post but I shall not, to avoid alot of commotion and unhappiness. And being thrashed by alot of people.

Whatever happens, at the end of the day, sweet karma nips you in the butt.

2007-08-31T05:37:00.000-07:00

Ah. It's been some time since i updated and i'm at a loss for words but i'll blog anyways.

It's been a pretty hectic week, with all the assignments, maths, bio stuff we've got to do, but it was fun too. Aliyaaaa!!!! Ok I've wished u a thousand times but i'll wish u once more..HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN!!! Oi and u better be happier now u're sixteen ok...haha and u might wanna realise that u're of LEGAL age now..if u get what i mean..;)

Ah that talk with Saran and Madu on monday was good. Recently, I(or we) have started wondering if at the end of the day, people go for good looks more than character. I mean look at the amount of people who fall in so called love cause that particular he/she's pretty/handsome. It sucks cause it's just physical attraction, and nothing close to love. And sometimes the people who actually have good characters are neglected, cause they might not look good. Well of course you could choose to see it as their loss, but it kinda annoys you, thinking how shallow people can get. But then again alot of things in this world are shallow. Oh well.

You could choose to sit down there and cry about how certain things turn out, or you could choose to see light in every situation, no matter how sucky it might seem. Yes i know it sounds cliche, but it's so true. The more you look on the brighter side of something, the happier you become, sometimes even appreciating it for happening. I'm happy about how certain things turned out over the months, cause I chose to look on the bright side of them. It's all in your head.

Today's teacher's day concert was so good... 5/1 did a really good job...haha it was so so funny...

To all the people having a hard time stuck in possessive relationships, it's so not worth it.

2007-08-22T08:12:00.000-07:00

Drama Os was good today! It was a pretty good job done in a short time frame, though we kinda didn't feel the urgency...haha and i still find it funny that I, I did an emo/creepy/goth/satanic child character...ah it was fun...and to all the drama Os people, good job! and to the people who came to watch us, thanks so much! and do give us your feedback...=)

I'm starting to think that the MOE should have tests for common sense. Like make it count for part of our grades or something. I mean, just because u can't score in academics, it doesn't mean u're dumb. And just because u can score in academics, it doesn't mean u have common sense. I mean, have u seen the number of people who are smart academically, but when it comes to common sense..Ah..It's amusing. I think it's totally pointless to walk around without much sense in your head.

And there should also be tests to see if u're a person who can appreciate life and understand people. It's totally sad when u're a smart thing, but can't look beyond your textbook and worksheets to appreciate finer things. What's the point in living life if u confine yourself to just work, studies blah blah and fail to notice people and life and learn some values out of it? Sometimes I feel like it's as if the world spins too fast, that we all get too caught up with our own mundane lives, and don't get to know the true meaning of living happily. We gotta slow down a little, take a break, and LIVE life. Right now it just zooms past us(or so i feel). That's really sad.

I believe in karma. What goes around comes around. It will be payback time for maths one day. One fine day.

I think I have the capacity to differentiate the truth from a lie.

The power of makeup

2007-08-19T06:28:00.001-07:00

Take a look at these pics. They're celebs with and without makeup.

Jennifer Lopez

Demi Moore

Heidi Klum

Avril Lavigne

Britney Spears

Madonna

Pamela Anderson
Images from: http://hereinreality.com/makeup.htm

This isn't meant to diss any celeb. What I'm trying to put across is, makeup does wonders. Don't get intimidated by what you see on tv. Cause for all you know, 90% of it is fake.

For more, go search for videos on youtube. I promise u'll be amased.

2007-08-18T08:51:00.000-07:00

So like half of ATC went for agememnon today. It wasn't that great...and i felt i could have just stayed home studying..but oh well, at least the visuals made up for it. But i totally hated the fact that the students who came for it laughed at the sex scenes and vulgarities, without knowing the true meaning of why it's there. And they're supposed to be drama students. Oh and the costumes were great too.

It's funny how people react when you tell them you wanna live by the beach. "Hahaha, when tsunami comes, u'll be the first to get hit lah..." So does that mean u're not gonna live in high rise flats for fear of getting hit by a plane? Or u're not gonna cross the road for fear of getting hit by a car(considering the fact that tsunamis happen like every 40 years or so and car accidents happen everday)? Or are u not gonna take the stairs for fear of tripping and rolling down? Geez.

Good luck to my A math test on monday. I so need to pass this.

And the more i think of tattoos, the more i seem to like them. =)

"yesh i was hawwt cause teii al sques to take the picxxss!!..i lubb eeuuuu berrii berriee muchxx!!" (whatever that means) is so NOT cute.

2007-08-17T06:29:00.001-07:00

Yay!! Finally friday night is here..i so love friday nights..especially when it's all cold and rainy..ahh...

Firstly, i gotta say so much abt sangae..but i'll make it short..ok sangae's this show which is put up every 2 years by the tamil cultural society of NUS...so my sis was involved this year...and it was in they form of a drama with songs and dances incoporated in...they had a super cool msg to put through..well i hope i got it right...something abt finding meaning in live before u lose it..i swear i had so much fun that night..especially since they had so much humour in it..and ok i don't think the non-indians can relate to this..but to the rest..the whole tamil village scene was soooo awesome...and the dance..it was like everyone wanted to get up and dance as well..it was bloody awesome...and i swear...i might never have said this out loud but i'm so proud to be an indian..=D

Hmm and maths. Ah. I've complained so much abt it im tired. And bored of failing it. Ah. I just hope the guys who researced on all these maths formulas and made it compulsory for school going people are having an awesome time in hell. I so hate them.

It's amasing how paranoid people get when it comes to height and weight taking in school. Over the past year or so, it annoys the crap out of me to hear people talk abt how fat they are, especially WHEN THEY'RE NOT, and how they pinch SKIN and say it's a whole lot of fat.

It goes a little like this: "Omg i'm so faaat!" / "Oh no i need to start running i'm putting on weight!!!" / "Oh no am i getting fat???" / "I'm not gonna eat lunch today cause i need to lose weight." And mind you, 95% of the people who say this AREN'T fat. I mean yes it's not wrong to say gee i'm putting a pound like occasionally, but if u say it so often, it annoys the crap out of people. It makes you wonder, if it's so wrong have a just little bit of fat around your butt. It makes you wonder if everyone HAS to be thin nowadays to feel pretty. It makes you wonder if being slim is the only way to feel good. What happened to appreciating and feeling great abt yourself the way u are? What happened to realising that everyone comes in different shapes and sizes, and not all people can look the same? Haiz. Maybe the world is being taken over by mass stupidity.

You might wanna try standing under super cold water for like 20 seconds after a shower. It apparently makes your skin look shinier and more tight. But maybe not on a rainy night. Baad decision. *shivers*

And yay! Even my sis wants to live by the beach when she grows older...Awesome.

We gotta start realising that money doesn't grow on trees. Nor in parents' wallets.

2007-08-10T08:44:00.000-07:00

Ah. 5 days of holidays seems good. But oh well i can never run away from homework nor exams nor MATHS. Haiz.

And! I think I've started to like the idea of tattoos (the black ones look cooler)!! Well ok initially i didn't quite like it thinking it was all gangster and stuff...but hey, if it has a meaning to it, it's awesome...something like famous paintings or drawings which have a underlying meaning to them...but except it's body art...and hmm...a hot black guy with a nice tattoo...not bad at all..haha...and miami ink is quite a cool programme...

Aliya is one funny person. Haha she asked me how i keep so happy like most of the time, and then i told her to think of happy random thoughts, and something happened, and she wanted to crash my happy feelings and started ignoring me totally. Oh well, it just made me laugh more cause i swear it was funny. And that woman loves ignoring me. Oh well its fun. Ah aliya, don't try to spoil the happiness. Join in. Trust me it's way better and happier. =D Ok i sound like some wierd happy being. Anyways...

Mauritius. Ah. I'll live there one fine day..Ok at least if it's not live, stay there for a couple of months...enjoy the peace, quiet, PARTAYY, and of course the beach. Ah. The beach. With some hot black guy. Now THAT's a happy happy thought. Oh and no i'm not racist.

And i hate the fact that blogger has such a small variety of font colours.

Sometimes, the best is worth keeping for last.

2007-08-06T08:09:00.000-07:00

Ah. I think I might officially start hating sundays. Whoever said that weekends were meant for relaxation should go shoot himself. Cause it's not. I just started tuition for maths and I'm not complaining, I NEED IT. In fact I arranged for it myself. Hah. Ms Geeta does know what she's talking abt and i do understand whatever she's taught so far, which is great. Yay i'm bored of failing maths for like ever since sec 2, and i so wanna pass this term.

Saranya is one marble. We were doing a trigo proving qn, and after she got the answer, she turned to the back of the book to look for the answer. Haha u don't look for the answer in a proving qn, it's just there. Ahh...I love that marble.

Sigh. I miss the nov/dec hols and jun hols, where there was actually time to sit down and well...just sit down. Oh and READ. I so miss the times where you come back from primary school especially, and you actually have time to sit and read. Reading is one awesome pastime(not to mention educational) and the people who think books suck should go shoot themselves too.

I realised that i drink water when i get bored. Say i'm chatting or watching tv, i get bored sometimes and i just drink water. More and more till i get full of water. Now that's just wierd. Gee if that's what i do when i'm bored, can it be called a pastime(gasps)? I mean who drinks water to past time??? I need a life.

And i'm starting to wonder what corndogs taste like.

2007-08-04T08:40:00.001-07:00

Yay! I convinced Sharas to not skip lunch if she hasn't had breakfast yet..haha and it was a pinky promise..so she better keep to it..

Congrats to Afiqa and Aliya for becoming president and vice-president of ATC!! I know you pple can so bring ATC to greater heights!

And it's funny how alot of grandads get bullied by grandmoms. Take Shalini's for example. Her grandmom almost strangled her grandad while holding a knife. Sof's grandad screamed when his pinky got stepped on. Sof's grandmom was cooking and got a shock and scolded the poor man whose toe was already hurting. And my grandmoms weren't particular nice to my grandads either. Ah. Grandmoms can be a nightmare eh?

And now I know what's body surfing! haha...

There's much more to a girl than good looks, a fab bod, nice hair and sweet talk.
There's much more to a guy than good looks, a charming smile, money and great hugs.
But some people just can't look beyond skin deep charm.

2007-08-03T06:42:00.000-07:00

Try asking a kid from someother country..Say Austrialia: "So what do you do during the weekend?" And he/she goes: "Oh well just hang out..Chill..Have some fun you know.." AND then you ask a kid from Singapore: "So what do you do during the weekend?" And he/she goes: "Oh. Simple what. Go tuition, do homework, watch tv, then sometimes go out."

ok honestly...we kids gotta take a lil break on our school lives...i mean like seriously...an average secondary student's life goes something like this:

1. Wake up at 5.30(or whatever time)
2. Reach school by 7.20am
3. Lessons go on till 1.10(or 2 plus)
4. CCA/Remedials/Just some other activity you gotta stay back for
5. School finishes at 6(or later)
6. Back by 7.30(or later)
7. Mug till god knows what time
8. Get 6 hours of sleep or less.
9. Back to step 1.

Ok ok..i know some people have got worse routines and i've got no right to complain...but Singapore's education system HAS to go just a little bit slower..i mean come on..we're just kids...with all the stuff at school, we hardly have a proper life out of school..and even if we do, 3/4s of it is spent doing school related stuff.. so yes..let's just pray that the moe does a miracle and decides to take it slow. (hah. like that's gonna happen)

and to the immature kids out there who think that your life sucks and no one cares no more, SHUT UP. and grow up. cause there are worst things out there and the world doesn't quite care about you whining.

2007-08-01T07:24:00.000-07:00

ah yes! finally! my blog's up! and for those who didnt noe..i did have a blog like 2 years back..haha but i found it pointless to post rantings of your daily life..but i guess it's ok cause u just wanna get it all out eh..hmm so i shall see how long this thing goes..anyways..

so us Olevel drama pple have got to do this self devised play..on a current issue..or anything at all..my wonderful group(consisting of bry, jacq, afiqa, saran,, hui xian and myself) came up with the idea of war..which we are faring at quite well now..we actually based it in the future..so we made it such that it points out stuff like:

1. In the future, man becomes so numb to war that it doesnt seem alarming anymore..which also means it rips u of basic emotions..
2. (even though its set in the future, we don't use high tech machinery) Thus showing that no matter how advanced you get, it eventually is between just you and yourself, that technology is not quite trustworthy. "Back to Basics" kinda concept. (did that make sense?)
3. War's just bad.

yup and like as part of research..i flipped through the papers and i swear..ok for those of u who actually read the papers..go to the main section..flip through..and there wud be at least 3 articles on bomb blasts and stuff..and like in a week..i promise u can find no less than 10 articles on war related events..which makes u kinda think really..

why war? cause in the end, six feet under, we're all equal.